Alone at night.

Family is people and family is love.
That's a family.
They come in all different sizes and different kind,
But mine's just right for me.
Yea, mine's just right for me.
- Barney

This is just a post by someone who is missing home.

Living far away from home is a new experience for me. Tho i'm already on my last year at collage, yes i just got a chance to live alone without my family, since they were moved to my hometown for about 2 months ago. And since i'm a family girl type, i really feel the difference. I used to do my home work and household thingy by myself, so actually it's not a big deal. But the things i really miss is the chatting time with my parents and siblings, doing things together, cracking some jokes and laughter. I usually discussed everything with my parents but now since they don't have enough time to call me often, yea, i really miss being home. It's not that i don't have any friends here, i have my besties by my side, they are also my family, but blood line is different. I really miss my bro and sissy, and since i'm the oldest from three, i'm close with both of them. Phone call, sms, and Whatsapp does help but you know that there's no better things than to see a person in real life.

Well, being alone at night does makes me write some melancholy stuffs >.<

These words really fits me now.

If love was a bird

Then we wouldn't have wings
If love was a sky
We'd be blue
If love was a choir
You and I could never sing
Cause love isn't for me and you

If love was an Oscar
You and I could never win
Cause we can never act out our parts
If love is the Bible
Then we are lost in sin
Because its not in our hearts

So why don't you go your way
And I'll go mine
Live your life, and I'll live mine
Baby you'll do well, and I'll be fine
Cause we're better off, separated

If love was a fire
Then we have lost the spark
Love never felt so cold
If love was a light
Then we're lost in the dark
Left with no one to hold

If love was a sport
We're not on the same team
You and I are destined to lose
If love was an ocean
Then we are just a stream
Cause love isn't for me and you

So why don't you go your way
And I'll go mine
Live your life, and I'll live mine
Baby you'll do well, and I'll be fine
Cause we're better off, separated

Girl I know we had some good times
It's sad but now we gotta say goodbye
Girl you know I love you, I can't deny
I can't say we didn't try to make it work for you and I
I know it hurts so much but it's best for us
Somewhere along this windy road we lost the trust
So I'll walk away so you don't have to see me cry
It's killing me so, why don't you go

So why don't you go your way
And I'll go mine
Live your life, and I'll live mine
Baby you'll do well, and I'll be fine
Cause we're better off, separated

- Separated by Usher.

               

" Tak mau memberimu tanya, jika hidupmu memang lebih tentram tanpa itu. Semoga kau bahagia dalam kesunyian kata-kataku..."

Another Wednesdays ;)

Our relationship. This far. Thru every temptation and hell. We're still together.

Curhat dikit.

Unforgivable sins:

1. End the phone call while the one who called you FIRST is your girl.
2. Ignore her all the time when you're busy. ALL THE TIME. You only need her when you're lonely, or when you need something from her.
3. Talking or having a chat with a bitch your girlfriend hate in front of her, or maybe on the social network, with a LOVELY nickname. No one use it even your girl to call you, except that bitch. Cute? Fuck. Your girlfriend read it, and you never thing about her feeling.
4. Mind your own business at the time she needs you the most. She may not always tell you,  so you must ASK, to anyone who knows anything about her.
5. Talking some words to your girls' best friends but when your girl ask you about it, you answer nothing except about the normative thingy. Those words does not make any change.
6. No words was said on your monthsary. Even giving her a phone call seems so hard to do. In addition, you choose to go back home without 'pamitan' as usual. You even dont ask about it.
7. Not putting any effort to make the situation better. Do you think that texts would be enough?

Just so you know, reasons above are enough for a break-up. ..

Entah.

Its been a week. Til now, we dont talk. But you know, i'm feelin okay with this situation. Ga ada keinginan buat mengakhiri situasi ini. Rasanya males. Il-feel. Bodo. Bicara masalah awalnya, honestly, for me, now it's not a problem anymore. But still, i cant be just like usual as before. Why? Me dont know. You know, its not about the beginning, its all about the process, and depend on what i've been thru for about the last 8days, i just can see it clearly now. I have lost the feeling. Maybe its too fast to decide this, mungkin banyak pengaruh yang membuat gue kayak sekarang, tapi toh, he didnt took any effort to make it better. Malah memperburuk. Entah. Now what should i do. Bertahan dengan kondisi ini yang ga bakal ada gunanya or maybe... Should we end this?

Apart

15 months. We dont meet. Even 2 say something feels really hard. Fuck today. So this is how it feels. To have someone just in your mind not in reality. We're way apart and no one would make any effort to make it better.

Mana Mungkin Aku Setia..

Sebenarnya ini bukan tentang kematianmu, bukan itu. Karena, aku tahu bahwa semua yang ada pasti menjadi tiada pada akhirnya, dan kematian adalah sesuatu yang pasti, dan kali ini adalah giliranmu untuk pergi, aku sangat tahu itu. 

Tapi yang membuatku tersentak sedemikian hebat, adalah kenyataan bahwa kematian benar-benar dapat memutuskan kebahagiaan dalam diri seseorang, sekejap saja, lalu rasanya mampu membuatku menjadi nelangsa setengah mati, hatiku seperti tak di tempatnya, dan tubuhku serasa kosong melompong, hilang isi. 

Kau tahu sayang, rasanya seperti angin yang tiba-tiba hilang berganti kemarau gersang. Pada airmata yang jatuh kali ini, aku selipkan salam perpisahan panjang, pada kesetiaan yang telah kau ukir, pada kenangan pahit manis selama kau ada. Aku bukan hendak megeluh, tapi rasanya terlalu sebentar kau disini. 

Mereka mengira aku lah kekasih yang baik bagimu sayang, tanpa mereka sadari, bahwa kaulah yang menjadikan aku kekasih yang baik. Mana mungkin aku setia padahal memang kecenderunganku adalah mendua, tapi kau ajarkan aku kesetiaan, sehingga aku setia, kau ajarkan aku arti cinta, sehingga aku mampu mencintaimu seperti ini. 

Selamat jalan, Kau dari-Nya, dan kembali pada-Nya, kau dulu tiada untukku, dan sekarang kembali tiada.

Selamat jalan sayang, cahaya mataku, penyejuk jiwaku,

Selamat jalan, calon bidadari surgaku ….

-B.J. Habibie

Antiklimaks

Kata temen gue, masa-masa jenuh dalam berpacaran itu pasti ada, dan terjadi pada masa yang berbeda-beda pada tiap orang. Umumnya, setelah waktu yang lumayan lama, sekitar setelah masa-masa 1 tahunan. Dan yaa... dalam menyikapinya, tergantung pada tiap-tiap pasangan juga. Berhubung gue lagi dengerin curhatan dan belom pernah pacaran lama sampe bertahun-tahun gitu... Ya gue sih dengerin aja.

Biasanya, masa jenuh itu dateng pasti ada alesannya. Ya karena jarak lah, pergaulan dan lingkungan yang baru lah, sibuk lah, dan itu semua mendorong kepada kejenuhan. Bosan terhadap hubungan yang gitu-gitu aja, terhadap sikap pasangan yang sama sekali ga ada peningkatan malah mungkin makin menurun dari keinginan. Hal-hal kecil bisa jadi bahan pertikaian, dan dalam menghadapi masalah-masalah yang hadir itu, kesabaran pun udah semakin tipis terkikis. Bawaannya pengen menghindaaaar terus, bahkan kalo emosi ga terkontrol bawaannya pengen putus aja. Padahal masalahnya tidaklah seberat itu. Hanya saja, rasa jenuh sedang melanda, jadi pikiran makin ga tenang, hati makin ga sabar dan bawaannya jadi pengen cepet-cepet ngambil keputusan. Alasan yang tidak jelas malah makin dikarang-karang. Haduh. Ribet deh...

Ga pengen kan, kalo hubungan yang kita bangun dengan susah payah, perjuangan kita pertahanin semuanya selama ini gagal dan sia-sia. Sebenarnya, ini hanya masalah kebiasaan belaka. Masalah lingkungan dan perasaan kita terhadap pasangan. Sesuatu yang baru akan memperbaiki segalanya... Asal bukan pasangan baru aja :p Sia-sia dong. Hehe. 

1. Jaga komunikasi itu penting. Menjaga komunikasi disini bukan berarti harus meningkatkan intensitas bertemu atau komunikasi di hp, sesuatu yang berlebihan juga tidak baik bukan? Yang penting, istilahnya apa ya, terpelihara mungkin. Sesuatu yang terlalu intens akan memicu kita kepada kebosanan, dan sesuatu yang terlalu jarang pun akan memacu kita untuk lupa dan cenderung ingin melupakan. Jadi temukan intensitas komunikasi yang optimal, yang pada tiap pasangan tentu saja berbeda. Coba mulai diperjarang sms dan telfonnya... Yang dari setiap 5 menit sekali menjadi 3 jam sekali, kemudian sehari 4x, lalu sehari 2x. Terus kurangi. Sampai pada saat lo ngerasa ga tahan. Tambah dikit. Coba selama beberapa waktu. Dengan syarat, dia mengetahui maksudnya dan mau menjalankan. Nah, untuk yang satu ini, i've tried. And it works. Lo bakal nyariin apa yang selama ini biasa lo dapetin, perhatian, dll. Jadi sekalinya ketemu atau komunikasi, kualitasnya bakal lebih meningkat.
2. Perbanyak bergaul sama temen-temen. Mungkin selama ini waktu lo lebih tersita sama pacar. Kemana-mana berdua. Apalagi buat kalian yang cinlok nih *ups. Weteng tresno jalaran soko kulino (semoga nulisnya bener). Cari suasana baru... Hang out sama temen-temen bakal jadi sesuatu yang asik karena jarang dilakuin, selain itu juga bakal lumayan menjaga jarak lo sm pasangan. refresh your mind... Jadi kalo ketemu pasanganlagi, bakal lebih seger tuh otak, bakal lebih berasa kangen, dan jadi ada bahan obrolan juga, hehe.
3. Kompromi. Ngomong 4 mata, eyes to eyes, heart to heart. Cari kegiatan-kegiatan (POSITIF) baru yang bisa dilakuin bareng. Buat kesepakatan-kesepakatan lucu yang seru, mungkin dengan berbagai reward dan sanksi biar makin unyuuuuwww :D
4. Inget kembali semua kenangan-kenangan manis yang pernah kalian lewati bersama, bagaimana perjuangan kalian memulai semuanya. Niat yang paling penting disini, kalo kalian masih pengen pertahanin semuanya. Jangan buat semuanya menjadi sia-sia...

Hosh. Ayolah, semangat!!!

Once again

Its been 1♡ months. And God has His own way to show us the meaning of our love. Every lesson came by many different way… The important thing is how we keep going thru every hell and temptation, its the PROCESS. We learned. We knew more and more each day about everything….Together :) That’s why my life is soooo fun with you, and it’ll turn dark without you in mine. 

Stay with me, my dear♡♡♡

Its a 1♡

 

 

Tak terasa sudah sejauh ini kita melangkah bersama. Ya, kamu dan aku, berdua. Maaf aku sering mengeluhkan terlalu banyak perbedaan diantara kita, saat itu aku hanya belum sadar, bahwa justru perbedaan itulah yang saling menyeimbangkan dan sudah mengantarkan kita sejauh ini. Aku sering berkata bahwa sayang dan cinta saja tidak pernah cukup untuk membentuk sebuah hubungan. Memang benar. Kepribadian kita sangat berbeda. Saat itu aku hanya lupa, bahwa ada yang namanya niat dan usaha. Perasaan yang kuat menjadi alasan kita berdua untuk berubah. Lebih baik, dan lebih baik setiap harinya. Meski hasilnya belum seperti yang aku atau kamu mau...Bagiku itu bukan masalah. Because as long as you're trying, i'm staying ;)

 10 bulan bukan waktu yag singkat, sayang. Bukan juga waktu yang cukup bagiku untuk menikmati hari-hari bersamamu, karena aku tak akan pernah merasa puas ;)

The guy i want

I want somebody who just want to be near me. To whisper in my ear. To hold my hand. To put my hair back behind my ears when it falls front. To wrap me in his arms, and tell me he loves me ♥♥♥

Kinda sweet thought

Girls are like apples on trees. The best ones are on the top of the tree. Most of the boys don’t want to reach for the good ones because they are afraid of falling and getting hurt.

Instead, they just get the rotten apples on the ground that aren’t as good, but easy. So the apples at the top will start to think something is wrong with them, when in reality, they’re AMAZING.

They just have to wait for the right boy to come along. The one who’s brave enough to climb all the way to the top of the tree. For those who are single, he will come, keep waiting patiently. For those who has someone that climbed that tree for you, make sure you hug him tighter today and never let him go :)

Love life

Relationship : there's no more YOU or ME. But US.

Our key chains

pointer

3rd monthsary

6th monthsary

Relationships last long because two brave people made a choice: To keep it, to fight for it and to work for it. And i hope this one, will last forever♥

12 things girls want boys to do

1. Hug her from behind. 
2. Grab her hand when you guys walk next to each other. 
3. When standing, wrap your arms around her.
4. Cuddle her.
5. Dont force her to do ANYTHING!
6. Write little notes. 
7. Compliment her. 
8. When you hug her, hold her in your arms as long as possible. 
9. Say i love you & MEAN IT! 
10. Brush the hair out of her eyes. 
11. Comfort her when she cries. 
12. Love her with all your heart. ♥

I miss you